Stop Trying to Fit In at Their Table & the Courage to Build Your Own

Somewhere along the way, many of us were taught that belonging meant being chosen. That if we worked hard enough, stayed quiet enough, or proved ourselves worthy enough, someone would eventually pull out a chair for us at their table.

But here’s what I’ve learned — after years of fighting for a seat, playing by invisible rules, and trying to earn approval that never truly filled me — the real power was never in being chosen. It was in choosing myself.

The Shift from Scarcity to Sovereignty

The scarcity mindset tells us there’s only one table, only a few seats, and that we should be grateful for scraps. But sovereignty says something entirely different:

There are infinite tables — and you can build one that reflects exactly who you are.

When you stop chasing inclusion in rooms that don’t value your essence and start building spaces that honor it, something extraordinary happens: the right people find their way to you.

That’s what this podcast — and this movement — is about. It’s not about fitting in. It’s about creating alignment, connection, and expansion by standing in your own truth.

What Art Has Been Trying to Tell Us All Along

Culture has been whispering this lesson to us for years through stories we love:

- In Legally Blonde, Elle Woods realizes her brilliance lies in being exactly who she is.
- In The Devil Wears Prada, Andy Sachs gives the coat back — choosing authenticity over approval.
- In Mona Lisa Smile, Julia Roberts’ character challenges women to dream beyond the roles they were handed.
- In Erin Brockovich, the woman who doesn’t “look the part” changes everything.
- In Joy, a single mother turns adversity into an empire because she believes in herself.
- And in Frozen, Elsa finally unleashes her true power when she stops concealing and starts creating.

These stories stay with us because they mirror a universal truth:
✨ The moment you stop trying to fit in at their table and start building your own, everything begins to shift.

My Own Turning Point

This isn’t just a metaphor — it’s the exact moment I’m living through right now.

I’m taking a big risk. I’m walking away from the “safe” path to build something that feels aligned with who I really am.

And yes, to some people, it looks terrifying. But I’m not scared. I know my abilities. I know my work ethic, my creativity, and my perseverance. I’ve learned to trust that even if I fail, I will figure it out until I win.

Because this time, I’m building my own table.

When I’ve tried to fit myself into other people’s definitions of success, I lost my spark. But every time I listened to my own rhythm — when I followed the vision only I could see — I felt alive again. I met women who shared my fire. Conversations became magnetic. My work became richer.

That’s what happens when you stop trying to earn your belonging and instead embody it.

The Collective Reframe

For generations, women have been told that power comes from being chosen. But our power has always come from choosing ourselves.

Scarcity whispers: stay small, be grateful, don’t rock the boat.

Sovereignty replies: you get to build the boat.

When you create from your truth — a business, a brand, a home, a legacy — you stop chasing validation and start radiating resonance. The right people don’t need convincing; they recognize you by your light.

That’s leadership. That’s alignment. That’s the new paradigm of power.

Reflection Prompts

Take a few minutes to journal or meditate on these questions:

1. Where in your life are you still waiting for a seat?
2. What table are you trying to fit into that doesn’t reflect who you truly are?
3. If you built your own table, who would you invite?

And here’s your non-negotiable:
Write down one thing you will never again trade away just to feel accepted — your voice, your softness, your time, your truth. Protect it. It’s the cornerstone of the house you’re building.

The Powerhouse Reminder

If this message resonates, my book The Powerhouse Handbook is the perfect next step. It’s a daily guide to help you reclaim your energy, your worth, and your sense of sovereignty — the very tools I used to rebuild myself from the inside out.

You can find The Powerhouse Handbook on Amazon here.

Final Word

Stop waiting for the chair.
Build the house.
Host the table.
Own the light.

And when you do, don’t forget to pull another woman forward.